Shaker

"For reasons that made sense at the time, this damp adventurer made a pact with the Overflowing Font of Slime and hasn't been the same since." -Making Up Adventurers, Cohost, 2024

Interview fragment, unknown publication, author unknown, date unknown but presumed pre-Unification

fragment begins

's it like?

"To be honest, it's not a bad gig, as far as 'serving an elemental otherwordly power' goes. The Overflowing Font of Slime doesn't ask for much." He is glistening with a green tinted sheen of slime and it splashes and drips from his hands after he slicks his hair back. "Mostly I just do my own thing."

What does it want you to do?

"Mostly it just wants to eat. and spread. And spread and eat. Like, you know slimes, how they do... they're not complicated. They grow, they spread, they eat stuff. The dungeon garbage disposal. I eat whatever I want, the Pact makes everything I don't need into slime - or ooze, maybe a gel once in a blue moon, it's a bit random - and it just falls off and wanders off to do whatever they do. I can go fucking hog wild at the buffet. It WANTS me to go hog wild at the buffet."

You leave monsters everywhere you go?

He raises his hands defensively. "They're barely more than amoeba, calling them monsters is kind of a reach, be real. Look, most of the ones I left behind today have already dried out." He points to his footprints in the grass, where the deposited slime has eaten the lawn down to the soil and simply shriveled up in the warm sunlight after. "I try to restrict my travels away from places with a lot of available uh, biomass - no forests or farmland - and I stick to where it's either warm and dry or mostly below freezing. The Font doesn't care. It's hands... uh... pseudopods off with me."

How'd you even end up like this?

"I was with a group moving through an old underground aqueduct system. It was wall to wall slimes in there, that's what they were paying us to fix, and we were getting steamrolled, literally just run over by the things. I had enough time to hold my breath and pray after getting pulled into one of those big fuckin cubes while watching my coworkers abandon me, and... turned out something heard. Next thing you know it spits me out and I have a new vocation."

What's the biggest difference in your life after that?

"Dating."

Worse?

"Thousand times better. They call me the

fragment ends